Saturday, June 24, 2006

Une Petite Annonce

Professional Woman seeks a deux piece in Paris. No smaller than 30m2 as it appears she has a lot of accumulated crap. Oh and just in case, if it can have a cave that would be really handy because then if she doesn’t get her act together and sell some of the furniture she’s not going to need she can store them.

She would really like to live in pretty much the same area, across the road, the building next door, anywhere around the Montmartre area, but obviously at the bottom of the hill because she can’t afford to live at the top of the hill. Alternatively she wouldn’t mind going back to the 14th as she already knows of a hairdresser there and wouldn’t have to go through that terrifying ordeal of bad haircuts again. Another alternative is somewhere near a really good Indian restaurant.

She doesn’t want to live in the 19th or 20th because it’s just too damn far away. She’s not really into the 12th either and if it’s the 13th it has to be before Place d’Italie. She doesn’t really like the 15th as most of it is too residential and boring and the 16th should be bombed out of existence along with all the fur coated, poodle bearing, white haired ladies who think that just because of their very existence they should be first for everything. The majority of the 17th, (where she doesn’t live) is a bit like that too but not quite as bad. So that leaves the 1st (ha ha like she's ever gonna find anything in her price range), 2nd (ditto), 3rd (ditto), 4th (ditto), 5th (ditto), 6th (ditto), 7th (ditto), 8th (pushing it), 9th (pushing it) 10th (mmm, would have to do some serious reconnaissance there before I could say for sure), 11th (ditto).

Right that should do it don't you think? I love flat hunting and just to make things really difficult I’m pissing off on holiday right in the middle of it all. Still inadvertently I have done the right thing as the city will be empty July 15th – August 15th whereas I would be here contemplating homelessness and not being able to contact anyone. Meanwhile I need to get my dossier ready, three of this and three of that and this and that and blurgh, blurgh, blurgh, blurgh...

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I've got a shed to rent in darkest Wales, if it was good enough for Dylan Thomas . . . .

skint writer said...

why am i anonymous?

Verilion said...

What do you think the commute from darkest wales to Paris will be like?

skint writer said...

Well, it's a tobacco-smuggling transit van to Calais, then a quick nip down the autoroute to Paris and voila!

Verilion said...

Well I've got to say that I am tempted but that Tobacco smuggling van, but I'll see if I can get something a little closer first ( ;

Minx said...

Desperate haircuts can't be choosers!

Don't 'a nonny mouse' Skint, you'll give me the willies (again)!

Minx said...

Think I missed a 'be' - and Skint's going to tell me off for sloppy editing!

Verilion said...

But there'something poetical in that typo that reminds me of Dylan Thomas. I'm also really impressed that according to my clock in the corner of my screen you are posting in the future. How do you manage that then? And as you are one minute more in the future than me, will I find a flat fast?

skint writer said...

you're allowed to be sloppy minx, you're an artist . . .

femme au foyer said...

Have you looked in FUSAC? There is an online version, I think.

Verilion said...

Hi Femme au Foyer, Thanks I hadn't thought of the FUSAC, but they are all furnished (and a wee bit pricey) but I'll keep looking. Still it's a rollover on Euromillions next week, so maybe I should have a go and then I can just buy my dream apartment! Even my magic word is tempting me to do that: EYEKUD!

Minx said...

So that's the problem, fingers in the future, head lagging somewhere in the last century, but of course, I'm an artiste, so it all makes sense!!!

I'm sure something will come up V and if not you can always take extended leave and come and live with me. We have always got someone dossing on the sofa, never quite sure how many people actually live in this house!!

Word ver says FDBHDI, does that help?

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